The Winter Wedding Read online

  “You’re silly.” Tamar shook her head. Her eyes warmed.

  “I miss you.” I looked backward toward the kitchen to make sure her father wasn’t in our line of sight. I kissed her again.

  “You saw me like eight hours ago.”

  “It’s been twelve. Twelve hours is too long to be away from you.”

  The light went out of her eyes. She pulled her hand from mine and side-stepped me to get down the remaining steps. I reached for her hand as she passed, but she didn’t let me have it. Instead, she walked into the living room.

  I peeled my coat off. Like a lovesick puppy, I followed her. I was going to lose my mind if this woman didn’t want me, so I pushed the thought out of my head.

  “The reason I needed to get in touch with you so desperately this morning is because I have to go back to Jersey. I have practice tomorrow. You know we play Sunday.”

  Tamar waited for me to continue.

  “Anyway, I was hoping you would come back with me. Go to the game.”

  Tamar hesitated. “I wanted to spend some time with my dad. I haven’t had a chance.”

  This was true. Tamar had been estranged from her father for the last twelve years – the same twelve years she’d been estranged from me. She’d only been in town for four days and most of those were spent at our reunion and then with me. “Yeah, I guess you do.”

  Tamar looked relieved, but I pressed. “What about the game?”

  She shrugged. “I’m not that into football anymore, but I guess I can come watch you play.”

  “Guess.” I swallowed frustration. She didn’t even sound remotely playful or interested. This was weird. She and I had spent the earlier part of yesterday with the kids from my youth foundation and then had dinner at her father’s girlfriend, Dell Mayweather’s, house. We visited my parents and then cozied up in front of my fireplace until the wee hours of the morning, getting reacquainted with each other. But now she was acting like I was a nuisance, distancing herself by claiming a seat in a wing chair when there were several other pieces of furniture in the room that would have brought us closer. “Tay, did I do something?”

  She hesitated before speaking. “I’m fine. I’m just, trying to wrap my head around everything, Stephen. I’ve been really isolated and private for the past twelve years. Being home, seeing my dad, seeing you and your parents. I think I’m overwhelmed.”

  I regretted my role in that. Denying I was the guy in the “Losing Her Virginity” video had kept us apart – painfully so. It had only been two days since I’d confessed. I’d been taking calls and giving interviews to the media the entire time. I’d made a public statement on Christmas Eve admitting I was the guy in the video, and reporters were all over it. I hadn’t thought about how the resurgence of the press would affect her. I just wanted to prove to her that I was willing to tell the truth. I wanted to earn her trust again.

  “This is all bad timing,” I said. “This isn’t a big story. It’ll die down.”

  Tamar frowned. “It appears to be a big story.” She reached for a throw pillow and placed it in front of her body. I felt like she’d put up a wall between us. I couldn’t help focusing on her lack of enthusiasm for my visit. It chilled the room.

  “It’s not. In a few days, they’ll be done with it. That’s why I’m taking all the calls. The sooner they talk to me, the sooner they’ll be done with me.”

  Tamar shrugged again.

  “You sure that’s it?” I asked.

  She played with the tassels on the edge of the pillow. “I was on the phone with my aunt a few minutes ago. When you arrived. She’s sick, and I’m a little worried about her.”

  “Which aunt?” I finally took a seat.

  “My mother’s sister. Joe.”

  “The one in Georgia.”

  Tamar hesitated for a moment before saying yes.

  “So, when you say sick?”

  She stood and walked to the windows. She pulled the drapes back and looked out. “I don’t know, Stephen. She’s had a bug for a month. I think I need to go check on her and since I have to go back to Atlanta for work, I don’t think I’ll actually make it to this game.” She emphasized the word this.

  I nodded understanding because I did understand, but I was disappointed. She hadn’t been to one of my games since high school. I stood. “No problem. Take care of your aunt. I just…” I took the steps necessary to close the space between us. I pulled her into my arms. “I’m sorry. I’m doing too much. I know.”

  Tamar shook her head. “You’re not.”

  “No, I actually am,” I said. “I’m acting like we don’t have the rest of our lives to spend together.”

  Tamar’s eyes got that strange look again. She swallowed like she was uncomfortable with what I’d said.

  “Because we do.”

  “It’s not that,” she said. “Two days ago, I was living a different life. Like I said, I need to wrap my head around the idea of a relationship.”

  “Maybe I need to date you.”

  Tamar laughed. “Well, I’m sure whatever you could muster would be an improvement over the low budget dates we had in high school.”

  I nodded, and spoke teasingly, “I seem to remember you enjoying those dates.”

  Tamar tossed her head back. The warmth I loved filled her onyx colored eyes.

  I rubbed my hand down her arm. “My season will be over soon and then I have a huge break before I start training in the summer.”

  Tamar smirked. “You have fifty-leven things on your calendar for your foundation.”

  “I’m going to pare all that back. I need to spend time with you. I’ll come to Atlanta if that’s what it takes.”

  Tamar managed to crack a smile, but again, the light went out of her eyes. I pushed the negative energy from that down into my belly. This woman did not want to talk about the future. It was triggering her.

  Change the subject, Pierce.

  “Have you had lunch? Can I take you out or cook for you? I can cook.”

  Tamar frowned. “I heard you could not.”

  “I have a few things I can do and look, I can warm up like nobody’s business. Dorsey keeps meals in the freezer for me,” I said, referring to my houseman.

  “I really want to spend the day with my dad. He’s probably in there fixing something for us right now.”

  I nodded again. I was getting none of her time today. That gut punch to my stomach pushed the wind right out of me.

  “Okay,” I said. “Well, I’ll uh, just go on and get on the road and head back. I need to rest up anyway.

  “Championship game in a few days.” She stepped toward the door faster than I would have wanted her to.

  I picked up my coat and slid it on. I leaned in for one more kiss. When I released her, her eyes seemed misty like she was on the verge of tears. Maybe her aunt really was sick.

  “Babe, let me know if there’s something I can do for you. Do you need a flight? My assistant can get you exactly what you need.”

  She pulled door open. “I appreciate that, but I’ve been pretty good at getting around. I’m sure I’ll manage.”

  “But the point is, you don’t have to manage. You’re my woman now, and I’m Stephen Pierce.”

  Tamar looked away, but I could see a playful smile had formed on her lips. She turned back to me. “I don’t remember consenting to be your anything.”

  “I felt a little consenting happening over the past two days.” I pulled her close again. “I know this is new, again, but Tamar Johnson, I’m never letting you go, so you can just get used to me.”

  “Never is a long time.” Those iffy words slipped from her lips way too easy. They were like this entire visit. Awkward.

  “Yeah, it is, but forever is our story. It has been since we were kids.”

  Tamar cleared her throat. “I’ll talk to you later.”

  “You’ll take my calls?”

  “Man, stop trippin’. I wa
s about to call you back when I got off with my aunt.”

  I could tell she was teasing, but her voice didn’t reassure me. “I hope so.” I felt my own voice tremble.

  God, I was begging.

  “I love you, Tay.”

  She didn’t reply. I was liberal with my love you’s. She was not.

  Something was off. I wish I had time to figure out what it was, but she wasn’t giving it to me. I leaned forward, kissed her cheek again, and stepped through the door.

  Tamar stood in the door as I backed out of the driveway. I waved one more time, and she waved back. I had the sudden revelation that I did not have her, not like I thought I did. Tamar and I had some painful years behind us.

  I was gripped by the eerie thought that we had some painful times ahead of us as well.

  Chapter 2

  My father was disappointed. It was clear from the expression on his face. Team Stephen Pierce as always, he gave me a disapproving look. “Don’t begin this thing with lies.”

  My father was leaving town in a few hours to go to Florida to prepare to preach the eulogy of a pastor friend of his, so I was not spending the day with him. I sighed. “I need space.”

  Daddy cocked an eyebrow. “Tell him that.”

  I turned and walked into the living room. “I did, but he won’t give me any.”

  My father followed. “Still, no reason to lie.”

  I went back to the windows. I pulled the drapes again. I wasn’t sure what I was looking for. I guess my peace, because that’s what the snow gave me and that’s all I could really see from this view. “I don’t want to get swept up in the whirlwind of Stephen.”

  Daddy nodded understanding. “You sure that’s it?”

  I shrugged. “I’m under a lot of pressure.”

  “To love someone.”

  “To be in a relationship like that.” I snapped my fingers. “It doesn’t even happen like this.”

  Daddy didn’t seem convinced. He was no more convinced than Stephen had been, but I wasn’t ready to tell either of them my truth.

  “You seem a little sad. Anxious even.”

  I sank into the comfortable chair that had been my mother’s favorite. I looked around the room. I realized very little had changed. How difficult that must be for Daddy’s friend, Dell. I wondered if he entertained her in this room with my mother’s pictures on the fireplace mantle. I wasn’t the only one having problems letting go of the past.

  “The idea of my life becoming public again is scary. This morning, I had ten emails from reporters, and I know my voicemail at work is full.” I pulled my knees to my chest. “I’ve been in hiding for so long that I don’t really know how to live in the open.”

  Concern wore heavy on my father. “I can ask Bishop Wilson to go in my place.”

  I popped out of the chair and approached him. I took his hand. “No. You’ve loved Pastor Norman from the time I was a child. Mom loved his family. Please, go do this for his wife.”

  “You’re welcome to join me. They’d love to see you. It’s been a long time.”

  I swallowed heavy emotions. “I’m not ready for a funeral at Christmas. I know that’s selfish, but I just can’t if I don’t have to.”

  Daddy nodded. “Your mother is smiling in heaven because you’re back in our house.” He pulled me into a hug. “I’m going to pack. I have a car coming to take me to the airport.”

  My father left. I was alone again. Alone with my anxiety over my aunt. Alone with my angst about Stephen. My aunt probably had a virus, but the secret I kept from Stephen was not a bug that would go away. It was a festering disease that was going to eat away at any chance we had at the forever Stephen talked about.

  Chapter 3

  His name was Dr. Butler. He was tall, good looking, divorced and Aunt Joe’s age, which was why she was all made up and dressed up for her doctor’s appointment.

  I stayed in the room while he did a thorough exam. Aunt Joe and he made all kinds of chatty, low-key flirty talk while he examined her. This was the first time I’d ever seen her as anything other than an aunt and a mother to Isaiah. She was a woman who desired a man. She’d been ignoring that part of her life.

  All I knew of any romantic history was that Aunt Joe had a boyfriend when I showed up on her doorstep twelve years ago. My drama encroached on her relationship and her man left right after helping to assemble Isaiah’s crib. Aunt Joe was hurt by his leaving, but she said he was kind of triflin’ anyway. I was hurt by Stephen. We’d formed an unspoken pact to swear off men – until now. Stephen was back in my life and now this man was curiously interested in his patient.

  “I’ll send the bloodwork to the lab, but for now we’re going to treat you for a respiratory infection.” Dr. Butler made notes on a digital tablet. “I know you’re tired, Joe, so I’ll let you rest overnight. I want you to get a chest X-ray tomorrow.”

  “Is that necessary?” Aunt Joe asked. “Can I get the medicine in my system and see if I need one on Monday?”

  He took Aunt Joe’s hand in his and nodded. “I’ll call you tomorrow. We’ll talk about it.” He winked at her and left the room.

  After picking up the prescription paperwork at the desk, we exited the office.

  “Scandalous,” I teased.

  Aunt Joe hit me playfully. “Mind your business.”

  “I was minding my business when all of the sudden, I felt like I was being pulled into a romantic drama flick in 3-D.” I raised my hands to my eyes and made mock glasses.

  Aunt Joe blushed. “I’ve been waiting for him to ask me out. As soon as he does, I’m getting a new doctor.”

  “Why do you need a new one? He seems like a good doctor.” I helped her into her coat.

  “Chile, you’re still young and thin. I don’t want my man to know how much I weigh and all my vital stats.”

  I laughed. “I guess you have a point there, but uh, he already knows, and you’ve lost weight anyway. Whatever the diet is you’re on has been working.”

  We took an elevator down to the main level of the multi-office building and swirled around in the revolving door to exit. As soon as the cold air hit us, Aunt Joe began to cough uncontrollably. She sounded horrible. I’d never heard a cough this bad.

  “Maybe you should wait inside until I warm up the car.” I removed tissues from my bag and handed them to her. She looked weaker than I’d ever seen her. I was glad they’d ruled out the flu, but I was hoping the doctor wasn’t being conservative in not admitting her to the hospital and giving her a day of IV antibiotics or something.

  Aunt Joe stepped back into the building. I helped her down onto a bench and left to go to my car. My phone rang as I was getting inside. I’d assigned a ringtone to Stephen and even though I’d promised I would take his calls, he would have to wait.

  I sent him a text message to let him know I was busy with my aunt at the doctor’s office, and he texted back that he would pray for her. I was happy to have him on the mainline to Jesus, because that cough needed intercession.

  I started the car and let it run for a few minutes before pulling out of the parking space. Aunt Joe exited the building. I hopped out and opened the door for her.

  “Tamar, I’m not dying. I can get in a car by myself,” she fussed, sliding onto the seat.

  I closed the door behind her and climbed in on my side. “Is your pharmacy fast?” I asked, knowing she used a small, family-run drug store that was owned by a member of her church.

  “They’ll get it ready for me as fast as they can, but I think I need to get in the bed. If you don’t mind, I want to go home.”

  I nodded. “I know you’ve been feeling bad for a while, but has it been this bad?”

  “I think I done took a turn for the worse. Probably all that cold air on Christmas.” She closed her eyes and rested her head against the window.

  If I was honest, the real reason I was here was to talk to her about Stephen. I needed to tell her he was bac
k in my life. Only she knew the complications that came with that. Aunt Joe had been my strength during the scandal twelve years ago. She’d been the person I’d run to when I left home. She’d lied to my father about my not being with her. Aunt Joe was the keeper of my secrets. But this was not a good time for my issues. She needed her full strength before I started with all my “what to do” and “what if” and “what now” questions.

  We arrived at her house, and I helped her out of her clothes and into bed. After giving her a few choices for drinks, I rushed back out to the pharmacy. She needed to get started on those antibiotics. As expected, at rush hour during cold and flu season, the small parking lot was jammed with cars and the drive-thru line was long, so I decided to go inside.

  After waiting more than twenty minutes in line, I was able to get the attention of a woman I recognized as a member of Aunt Joe’s church to request the prescriptions, but even with expediting the service, the wait was thirty minutes. Since I had time, I decided to call Stephen.

  He answered. I could tell he’d been sleeping. He was in Seattle. It was a little after 2 p.m. there.

  “Sleepy much?” I teased.

  “We worked hard this morning. Dinner is at six. I need some rest before I have to get ready.”

  “You’re probably jet-lagged too. The time difference.”

  “All that,” he said. “I’ll be in bed way before curfew tonight.”

  A smirk peppered my tone. “Before 10:30 on a Friday night?”

  “Girl, I’m the same homebody you knew back in the day, but nobody on the team is hanging out in Seattle tonight. We came to win this game.”

  “I hear you. Let me let you get your nap.”

  “No. I’m always glad to hear from you. I’m not sleeping yet. How’s your aunt?”

  I filled him in on her visit. He whistled. “That infection hit her hard. She’s not that old, is she?”

  “She’s in her mid-50’s, but I think she needed to get to the doctor a few weeks ago.”

  “She’ll be all right. We’ve got her covered in prayer, and you’re picking up the drugs,” Stephen said. “You were right to go check on her. It sounds like she needed you.”